Episodes

I share a building with 500+ people and can't remember the last time a stranger there turned into anything. Not a date, not a friend, not even a regular conversation. This week I figured out why, and it's not the building, it's not the city, it's not even really about being single. It's the same reason dating apps had to exist in the first place, and once you see it you can't stop noticing it everywhere.

My ex contacts me every three or four months. The message is always the same formula, she has something to tell me, but she never says what it is. This episode breaks down textbook avoidant behavior, why she vanished the last time I responded warmly, why she'll never acknowledge what ended us, and the uncomfortable part about why her three-month cycle is perfectly timed to the exact moment my memory finishes editing her back into someone worth answering. And yes, I'm calling it now. She'll be ba...

Politics has become one of the biggest filters in modern dating—but I don't think politics is actually the real issue. Over the last year, I've noticed something changing on dating apps. People aren't just telling you what they believe anymore. They're telling you who they refuse to date before you even say hello. So when did politics stop being something we discussed and start becoming part of our identity? In this episode, I look at how curiosity, open-mindedness, echo chambers, and social ...

A conversation that should have never happened made me realize something I hadn't connected before. Dating apps and matchmaking services are trying to accomplish the same thing, but they're built on completely different incentives. One depends on engagement. The other depends on successful introductions. Once you notice that difference, it's hard to stop seeing it. It's why so many people are giving up on the apps, and why I think we're getting close to the next evolution of online dating.

I did sixty episodes of this podcast without ever showing my face. Then I turned on a camera and everything changed overnight. Comments, DMs, strangers feeling like they knew me — none of it happened for fourteen months and then all of it happened at once. This episode is about why presence does something that photos and audio never can, what it means for your dating profile, and why the thirty seconds of video you haven't posted yet might be the only thing standing between you and a connection...

I've finally had it. This one's a little different. Shirtless showdowns, pickleball pansies, Wimbledon-level tennis jags on a public court, scooter shits, absurdly loud cars, and industrial-strength playground blunts. Tune in for a completely reasonable and measured discussion. Obviously. If you'd rather see the video version, check it out here: https://youtu.be/U_4YlQPOqWg Or here: https://open.spotify.com/show/2DFGqBQLbCS6xvtSGBNGv1?si=A2hfflj2RJCcM3pYPp4Umw

Most people on dating apps can answer a question. Almost nobody can actually play. This episode is about the difference and why it's the only thing I'm still looking for. Check out the video version on YouTube and Spotify! Or just listen to the audio version, gramps.

She was smart, funny, attractive, and easy to talk to. Two days of genuine connection that felt like something real. And then she mentioned something which changes everything. This episode is about the information people strategically withhold in early dating, the specific details that would change everything for the other person if disclosed upfront. Some of it is serious. Some of it is ridiculous. All of it is real. Things that belong in your bio but somehow never make it there.